Winter Furniture and Mink Throws for the Rich!

With leisurely summer vacations and the autumn solstice now behind us, it's that time of year again to knuckle down and face the hectic Fall Social Season as well as the onslaught of holidays ahead. Except for the Pillsbury Dough Boy, I haven't seen any Christmas ads on TV yet. But as soon as Halloween is over you know very well that all hell is about to break loose. It's exciting to be sure, but scary as well with all the crazy work coming up!

Of course in major homes (like this one where I work) the house staff, secretaries, personal assistants and events planners get an early jump on all this, starting in mid-summer. We've already had our Christmas cards designed and printed, and they're going to the calligrapher in November as soon as we finalize the list - the usual fuss about who's in and who's out this year.

More importantly, we've already pinpointed the dates for a major fundraiser, two political cocktail buffets, and the annual Christmas gala for friends and family. All of which makes it easier for our events planner to schedule caterers, musicians, florists, house decorators, valet parkers and security, with plenty of time to design party invitations and save-the-date notices.

On my end, I have to keep up with all the gift shopping for the season and make sure that all goes smoothly and timely, especially for gifts that must be shipped overseas. Mercifully I have our personal shopper to lean on for most of the heavy lifting. But my other big task this month is to bring down all the winter furniture and trappings from the attic.

What? What's that you might ask?

I know, right! But it's true. While most of us have furnishings and accessories that suffice us year round in our comfy homes and apartments, not so for the super rich. There's such a thing as spring and summer furniture and fabrics, versus autumn and winter.

Lightweight breathable fabrics with airy light colors and floral prints are for spring and summer furnishings, of course. Heavier fabrics (such as wool, tweed, flannel and corduroy) with darker solid colors and plaids are for the autumn and winter months - providing a warm and inviting look on cold wintry evenings.This goes for bed clothes (sheets, pillow cases, bedspreads, duvets and shams) as well as draperies, curtains, furniture pillows and throw blankets. So we've got a lot of work to do in switching the house from summer to winter.

I have to tell you that in this house most of the throw blankets are made of genuine mink, although there's a big one in the Family Room made of Chinchilla. Which reminds me, I need to run get them out of cold storage where we send send them during hot summer months - along with the household furs. But in case you're curious, for more information about fur throws you might check out this website. They have many different furs from mink to rabbit to suit anyone's budget. Well, except for mine I guess. But I'm totally cool (which is to say warm) with my old-fashioned cotton quilts.

The whole subject of furs is intriguing and complicated. Certainly I'm aware of PETA's stance on animal rights and their objection to rich people wearing furs for the sake of glamour - and they have a point. Indeed, just this week California became the first US state to ban the manufacture and sale of clothing items made from furs. Prada has announced they'll eliminate furs in their future fashion lines. And a major world-famous department store, Selfridges in London, has announced limited sales of exotic skins.

But furs have been a part of human history since the dawn of time in keeping people warm - from cave dwellers in prehistoric days right up through British royalty and the glitz and glamour of Hollywood. The argument is strong that with modern fabrics and manufacturing techniques the need for furs to keep humans warm is no longer necessary. So it becomes a matter of personal conscience, asethetics, and the passion for beauty that keeps furs in the picture. If Regina ever stops wearing those exquisite ermine furs when she's holding court at Buckingham Palace, then perhaps we'll witness a sea change in this social delimna. We'll just have to wait and see where all this goes. 

Sorry for straying so far off topic, but it's a fascinating and confounding subject. All of this assumes we'll even have a winter this year anyway, but with climate change and all, who knows, right? I guess the most prudent thing to do is to keep going on with traditions as if all is well and nothing is wrong.

I hope your plans for autumn and the holidays are going smoothly and that you don't have to break your backs dragging winter furniture down from the attic. And by all means, don't forget to grab your furs out of cold storage before the winter chill sets in.

As always, thanks for stopping by this evening,
Andrew

Cosmetic Surgery in the World of the Rich!

"I see a lot of new faces out there tonight - especially on the old faces." - Johnny Carson.

Of course, that brought a big laugh from his TV audience. But Carson was tapping into a source of humor that all rich people understand - their endless quest for youth and beauty. Which comes up now because this is the time of year when rich people return from their mysterious winter trips abroad, ready to show off their new faces and bodies for the Spring Social Season.

I can't wait to see the results and wonder if I'll recognize anybody. There comes a point when the face has been stretched so many times that original features start to disappear. What's left is just this smooth mask-like visage - which is one of the reasons I've often said that rich people all look alike to me. The other being their flawless makeup, currently-popular coifs, and of course the endless parade of haute couture and flashy jewels. Seriously, it all becomes a blur.

A few years back I remember telling you about one lady whose face had been stretched so many times that she had a permanent smile - which is why no one ever invited her to a wake or funeral. Last year she had her back stretched and showed up at a cocktail event in a backless dress. Which was  (how to say it politely?) a source of murmur and comment. I'm wondering what the poor thing will look like this year.

A couple of years ago my employer and his then-current girlfriend had their eyes lifted during a winter disappearance. When they got home, with the lingering black eyes and bruising for days on end, they looked like two raccoons sitting there at the breakfast table and didn't dare go out for the evening.

But this year it seems my employer opted for Botox rather than going under the knife. The upstairs maid found a bill for one treatment, photographed it and texted it to me. Indeed, there's noticeably less laugh lines around his mouth. And since the crabby old buzzard gentleman doesn't laugh or smile very often, I'm thinking this treatment will last a lot longer than the usual five-or-six months.

While it's all a source of humor for most of us, there are huge risks involved with these procedures, and there's endless tales of botched cosmetic surgeries that didn't go so well - leaving people with unexpected blemishes and scars.

I once worked in a five-star hotel where a famous and elegant high-society socialite often showed up, always wearing dark veils. She was the heiress to an oil-fortune magnate, and history records that she was somehow "mysteriously disfigured". But rumor was rampant at the time that while undergoing plastic surgery, an oxygen tank had exploded in the operating room.

I'm not sure why I'm reporting all this. The temptation to undergo youth-restoration procedures is entirely understandable. Why not? But it's urgent to seek out the best practitioners available - no time to cut costs here. By all means, check out their references, their successes, and their failures. I mean, how do you go to sleep with a permanent smile stretched on your face?

There is something to be said, after all, for growing old gracefully. Age is a gift, is it not? So many, many people for so many, many reasons don't get to experience this normal progression of life. But rather than going under the knife, the old standbys of exfoliating, regular facials, Oil of Olay moisturizing products and Porcelana Fading Cream can go a long way in upping one's self esteem in the inevitable and god-given process of aging.

As always, thanks for stopping by this evening. I hope this report hasn't been too alarming!

Andrew
 

Christmas Gifts for the Rich: The Orient Express!

In September I mentioned a few items that might be great gifts for the super rich. It's really hard to buy for them, you know? Considering they already have everything under the sun, right?

But thanks to our Twitter pal Jim Kendall (luxury real-estate mogul in Boston) it occurs to me that the gift of travel could be entirely unique and well received by our rich friends - if presented carefully and in the right way. Who doesn't love to get out of town and do something different, right?

For example, how about open tickets (meaning 'at your convenience' ) for a ten-day holiday on a luxury Mediterranean cruise ship? (Which is generally under $50,000 per couple.)

And then, how about open reservations for a six-day revitalization visit to the luxury spa Clinique La Prairie in Switzerland? Who wouldn't appreciate that? (About $33,000 per person, or $66,000 per couple.)

Or perhaps open tickets for the three-room apartments on the UAE's luxury airline Ethiad Air -complete with a private shower before landing? (A round-trip ticket from New York to Mumbai, for example, would be roughly $76,000 per couple.)

But Jim was talking about something new altogether. It seems the renowned Orient Express, serving the rich and famous since 1883, is upgrading some cars to accommodate the current new breed of super rich - who are always looking for new thrills and adventures. In it's long 135 year history the train has not only been known for luxury but also mystery and intrigue - as in Agatha Christie's book and film Murder On the Orient Express.

Like many other children, my father bought me a miniature train set when I was a child and I've been hooked on train travel ever since. As a family we took trains all across America and Canada, with sleeping cars, an observation car, and a dining room with linens and crystal wine glasses on the table. All so awesome! And then in later years as a poor back-packing student traveling in Europe, cheap passenger trains were always the transportation of choice. Not just for the scenic beauty but also the wonderful people you meet along the journey.

One summer in Istanbul I went to the train station to check out the Destination Board, trying to decide where to go to next. To my excitement the Orient Express was pulling into the station at that very same time! At least twice I walked the entire length of the train on the platform, peering into windows and watching the well-heeled passengers depart - summonsing porters to pick up their Louis Vuitton luggage and steamer trunks. Just so elegant and mind boggling!

But now getting back to the subject, here's a link to the newly added suites for the super rich on the Orient Express. At a mere $7,000 per night per person, you can easily see why this would be a great gift for your best rich friends. That's only about $200,000 for a couple to have a two-week trip, right? Perfect for a honeymoon or anniversary celebration, as well as other such reckless events.  Conde Nast Traveler

I hope this has been somewhat helpful in making gift decisions this year?  Or what?

As always, thanks for dropping in this evening,
Andrew

Birkin Handbags: Gifts for the Rich!

In the November post about Ethiad Airways luxury $48,000 suite for an overnight flight, Stacy left a hysterical comment about running across a used Birkin Bag for the exact same price! Here's part of her comment:

"...I was having a conversation with my boss this week and I told her about how I'd seen a used 2013 Birkin bag for sale for $48,000. Her response is that no one with a conscience should ever pay that much for a bag. Then I remembered your post and realized it was the same price as the flight. Even though I agreed with my boss that no one NEEDS a handbag that costs as much as a luxury vehicle, the truth is, no one NEEDS a luxury vehicle either....there's simply no way to justify a $50,000 handbag except to say...it's really really really GORGEOUS...and it'll last a lot longer and get more miles than that flight :-)"

While I agree with you and your boss Stacy, and the questionable need for a purse that expensive, it's a real bargain in my opinion since Birkin's can run as high as $150,000. In fact, there's a one-of-a-kind Birkin being offered on the internet right now for $450,000!

In addition, there's a defensible place for these extravagant handbags in the world of the super rich. To explain it fully, I'm going to slide into sheer fantasy for a few moments and hope it makes sense in tying it altogether:  

To begin this scenario, lets focus on an imaginary Miss Betty Bankstocks sitting in the back seat of her vintage $2 million dollar chauffeur-driven Rolls Royce on her way to the airport. Wearing a simple $85,000 couture travel dress, she glances at her diamond-encrusted $1.2 million dollar Patek Philippe wristwatch to see is she's on time.

At the airport the staff aboard Ethiad Airways escorts Miss Bankstocks to her $48,000 suite, complete with private bathroom and shower, where she hopes to get a good night's sleep before her girlfriend's three-day birthday celebration begins the next day.

Before arrival the next morning she takes a quick shower and jumps into a new $125,000 haute couture cocktail dress. Feeling well rested and refreshed, she takes a limousine from the airport and a private water taxi out to her girlfriend's $225 million dollar luxury yacht sitting in the Bay of Monaco, with the Monte Carlo skyline shimmering in the background. The staff aboard the yacht hoists up her antique $75,000 Louis Vuitton wardrobe trunk and takes it to her room.

Right on time she glides into the main salon where late-morning cocktails (Bloody Mary's and Mimosas) are just getting underway. Amidst all the chatter and greetings the Maitre'd makes a hand gesture as to where she can park her $150,000 Birkin bag on a side table, in full view of all.

And that's precisely the moment when an expensive bag like that shows off it's true value. What else could Miss Bankstocks have possibly sat down there that would reflect her true status in this world? A cheap off-the-shelf $5,000 purse from Bergdorf Goodman or Neiman Marcus?

I don't think so, not in that crowd!

Anyhow, thanks for reading tonight and indulging in the fantasy. The super rich do things in their own odd way with cost being the least consideration over style, elegance and presentation. And thanks again Stacy for bringing up such a fun topic.

Before going, here's a link to what Birkin Bags are all about.

Good night,
Andrew

Avant-Bland versus Normcore!

I don't know about you but all of a sudden my somewhat-drab and dreary wardrobe is back in style, perhaps even considered high fashion in some circles nowadays.

The trend toward bland average-looking attire - whether from an upscale department store like Bloomingdale's or Nordstrom, or from the big-box stores like Walmart and Target - is suddenly all the rage and no doubt causing some concern among fashion designers world wide.

The buzz words 'Normcore' and 'Avant-Bland' are all over the place to describe this new fashion phenomenon. Of course, it's yet to be determined if these are real and sustainable trends or if it's just some kind of imaginary hype and babble from the low-end manufacturers and retailers. In either case, there's a subtle difference between the two terms to begin with.

Normcore seems to refer to our everyday blue-collar work attire (the Jerry Seinfeld look), plus the creative street wear that young people come up with all the time.

Avant-Bland on the other hand gives the appearance of Normcore upon first glance. But closer inspection reveals it to be a high-fashion design from a well-known designer, cleverly disguised and jumping on the current, trendy bandwagon of Normcore.

My friend Linda in New York is known to show up at the TV studio where she works in jeans and tee shirts from Old Navy, and a pair of sneakers.

Miss Helen is known to run around her chic Washington neighborhood in old designer jeans and a pair of comfortable but scuffed-up black high heels.

Since the divorce things have gotten more lax around here and I myself show up for work in 501's, sneakers and a polo shirt - but from Brooks Brothers, I might add.

So what are we? Normcore or Avant-Bland? How about a new fashion category altogether: 'Just Shut Up'.

The whole issue will probably settle out as merely another semantic battle between the haves and have-nots, a temporary consumer rebellion against the ruling 1%.  But I think the have-nots are gaining some ground here - which is to say, it's okay to be Normcore in this life, regardless what the Fashionistas have to say.

Thanks for dropping in tonight.

Andrew

The Imperial Faberge Eggs!

Yesterday I had to deliver a gift to one of my employer's friends, and while there the house manager was kind enough to gave me a quick tour of the downstairs.

Although the house was attractive overall it was obviously the work of an interior decorator, with no personal touches from the family to speak of - usually the telltale sign of the new rich. To me these kinds of rooms appear cold and uninviting - like being in an up-scale furniture store rather than a private home.

While I was trying to be polite, you can imagine my shock when I spotted a knock-off copy of a Faberge egg sitting in a prominent place in the formal living room. What on earth? My first rational thought was that the decorator should immediately be thrown into prison and tortured, perhaps even locked in a room full of Alexander Calder mobiles. Plus I was confused as to why the house manager hadn't taken it upon himself to accidentally break this hideous objet d'art years ago.

You see, rich people generally eschew copies of anything - going straight for the original. And failing that, they'll buy something else altogether rather than expose themselves to gossip at having knock-offs sitting around the house.

There were only about fifty Imperial Faberge Eggs created in the first place, by Peter Carl Faberge for the Tsars of Russia. Reportedly only forty-two survive, and these bejeweled eggs are valued in the multi-millions. While a few might be in the hands of a rich private collector, most are cloistered in museums around the world, especially the Kremlin Armoury Museum in Moscow.

Certainly they are not sitting on a coffee table inside the home of a new-rich family.

There are several companies offering Faberge-style eggs, some of them quite expensive, even into the low thousands. And there's nothing wrong with that - as long as they're meant for an obscure shelf somewhere, or perhaps a child's bedroom.

But for prominent display? No, don't do that. Scandal and gossip is the only possible outcome.

Here's a link to images of the Imperial Eggs. Again, each and every one worth millions. Not a bad deal for something that comes out of a chicken's butt.

Thanks for dropping in,

Andrew

   

Patek Philippe: Watches for the Rich!

The first time I ever heard of Patek Philippe was quite a few years back when my friend Ray in New York told me he was going to sell his father's hand-me-down watch to help raise cash for a new business venture - a film he and his colleagues were trying to put together.

I tagged along that day, expecting to schlep around to all the high-end pawn shops in Midtown Manhattan and to the jewelry exchanges in the diamond district. But instead, we took  a taxi to York Avenue on the Upper East Side where he turned the watch over to Sotheby's Auction House.

And a few months later my friend Ray received a check from Sotheby's for $33,500! Whoa! That's some kind of hand-me-down, right? Then a few years after that, while staying with friends in Switzerland, I used to walk past the Patek Philippe Museum in Geneva almost every day of the week for the entire summer - and never went in! What was I thinking?

Horologists to European royalty and rich people all over the globe, Patek Philippe has been around since the early 1800's, and if I'm not mistaken they hold the record for the world's most expensive watches, at over a million dollars! But not to panic; they're not all million-dollar watches, of course. They do have a middle range - anywhere from $100,000 to $500,000 - to accommodate both the billionaires and the lowly millionaires. 

In addition (and here's the good news) they also have a low-end line for those just getting started in their upward climb into the world of the UHNW. With no trouble at all you can find a nice little watch in the $10,000 to $50,000 range. 

The reason this all came up is because the Missus had a birthday this week. And Ester the Upstairs Maid reports there's an open, empty watch box in the boudoir with the label Patek Philippe. Of course I can't wait to see it and figure out if it's low end or high. (It's the diamonds surrounding the face of the watch that jacks the price of a lady's watch sky high.)

Anyhow, I'm really kicking myself tonight for not having gone into that museum in Geneva. How dumb can you be? I think it was Aristophanes who said, "Ignorance can be educated, but stupid is forever."

As always, thanks for stopping by.

Andrew

The Package from Bijan: Mystery Solved!

Last week I told you a package for the Mister had arrived from the House of Bijan and that no one was home to open it! Ester and I have waited quite impatiently for almost a week to find out what's inside, and finally our employers returned this morning, around ten-thirty.

Right next to the elevator there's a long narrow side table where things are placed that need to go upstairs, including the daily mail and packages.

In fact, it's my job to separate the mail each day into His and Her piles, further organized by their personal letters, cards and invitations on top, business mail underneath that, and overnight letters from Fed Ex and UPS underneath that. Next to these two stacks, magazines are separated into those the Mister has subscribed to, and those the Missus wants to receive. Department store magazines and other junk mail are next to that, which are usually ignored and destined for the recycle bin. And at the end of the table is where we place packages.

When they arrived this morning they left the luggage up to us, picked up their respective piles of His and Her mail and went straight upstairs to their separate offices.

Ester and I looked at each other with fallen faces. Apparently packages were the last thing on their minds at the moment. But then at one o'clock they came down for lunch. I was out running errands at the time, but Ester sent a text that said the Mister had taken the package upstairs right after lunch.

She is the Upstairs Maid after all, and as soon as appropriate she scooted upstairs to snoop around. By the time I got home she was full of news!

It seems the package was a gift from the Mister's sister - which was somewhat of a disappointment since we had hoped the old cheapskate had actually been shopping there himself. And while we had been hoping to see some exquisite accessories, it turned out to be just a shirt and tie.

Having said that, Bijan's shirts are limited editions, of course, and can cost anywhere from $350 on up! And the tie, also a limited edition, is signed and numbered. Only God knows the cost of that.

So the big mystery's over. And while we may have been disappointed, at least now we can say there are Bijan labels in the Mister's closet. And no one needs to know it's only two.

Thanks for stopping by. Hope you're not as disappointed as we are.

Andrew

Bijan - Beverly Hills!

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Earlier today in a post entitled "Rodeo Drive" I told you about a package that had arrived with a Rodeo Drive return address.

I also told you there's no one home to open it! And that Ester and I are on pins and needles, dying to know what's inside!

What I failed to mention is the name of the shop.

You see, the package (addressed to the Mister) is from the House of Bijan - renowned haute couture for men.

This boutique is so exclusive you can't get in the door. Literally! 

It's by appointment only, and I have a feeling designer Bijan Pakzad himself decided who might cross the threshold. While his client list is not well publicized (except by the paparazzi, of course), he's said to have dressed over thirty heads of state, including US presidents, European Royalty and the rich and famous from all walks of life.

In addition to couture, he's also known for his fragrances, sold in major department stores worldwide. And he has a line of exquisite jewelry and watches for both men and women.

To top it off, he also designs the exterior and interior of  custom-made Rolls Royce's and Bugatti's on a per-client basis. How awesome is that?

Here's a link to Bijan's amazing world.  And get ready to be enthralled! 

More than once, even by the designer himself,  the House of Bijan has been billed as "the most expensive store in the world!"

And then you'll understand why Ester and I are so agitated!  (lol!)

Again, thanks for stopping by today.

Will let you know what's in the box the minute the Mister gets back next week.

Good night,
Andrew


PS: You may know that Bijan, as he liked to be called, died just recently in 2011. But his legacy and shop lives on, under the direction of his  partner and the world-famous designers who continue to showcase their wares in the inventory.

Where Rich People Shop: Rodeo Drive!

A package arrived this afternoon with a Rodeo Drive return address. There's no one home to open it and it's driving me and the upstairs maid Ester crazy! We've considered ripping it open and blaming it on Fed Ex. But I'm afraid we've done that too many times to keep getting away with it.

In north American speech and in cowboy movies the word rodeo is pronounced row-dee-o. But in Beverly Hills the original Spanish pronunciation is employed and you'll hear them say row-day-o when referring to the world-famous shopping district known as Rodeo Drive.

Cowboys on Rodeo Drive are few and far between. And the only horses around would be found under the hoods of Ferrari's, Bugatti's and Lamborghini's. Remember the film Pretty Woman where Julia Roberts gets a makeover and goes shopping for a new wardrobe? That's Rodeo Drive.

It's full of high dollar shops and boutiques that attract the rich, the famous and the powerful from all over the world. From Fendi and Frette to Valentino and Van Cleef, the worlds finest designers display their wares in one small but exquisitely glamorous area of Beverly Hills

If you think this would be a good place to star gaze, you're absolutely right. But to see your favorite star up close you'll have to wade through a small army of paparazzi, valet parkers, doormen, security guards, personal assistants and sometimes body guards. 

Just take a look at this link to Google Images to see what I'm talking about.

So without an x-ray machine, I guess Ester and I will just have to wait it out until our employers get back next week. Which is not an easy thing, mind you. During this boring time of year in between social seasons things can get pretty dull around here.

Thanks for stopping by. And will let you know what we find out.

Andrew

Saks Fifth Avenue: Where Rich People Shop!

Apparently I'm writing a lot these days about where rich people shop, but it's the holidays of course, and I'm getting a lot of questions on the subject.

Before we go any further I need to mention one of the most venerable and beloved department stores of all times - Saks Fifth Avenue. Usually referred to as just Saks, it's the zenith of fashionable and gracious living and has spread form the original New York store to major cities across the country. In fact, I'm going to defer to their website and let you explore for yourself. Here's the link.

What I can tell you from personal experience is that a visit to Saks is an awesome and memorable experience, especially the flagship store in Manhattan. In addition to old-world elegance and a relatively-polite, loyal and knowledgeable staff, it sits there on Fifth Avenue right next door to the Cathedral of Saint Patrick, also known as St. Patrick's Cathedral.

On the north side of Saks, on each floor, there are beautiful wood-framed arched windows that overlook St. Pat's. And on each and every higher floor you have a different and better view of the spectacular architecture of this Neo-Gothic cathedral, right up to the spires.

Whether you're going there to shop or don't have a dime in your pockets, you really need to visit this store - and they're accustomed to tourists wandering in and out, trust me on that point. No other department store I know of can offer this kind of experience. 

On the top floor there's a lunch room called Cafe SFA with amazing views and a menu that won't break the bank. So if you've not been there before or you're visiting New York for the first time, make this a special outing. You'll not be disappointed.

Happy shopping, and thanks for stopping by,

Andrew

Neiman Marcus: Where Rich People Shop!

For over a century Neiman Marcus has been a legendary player in the dazzling world of luxury department stores for the rich. Usually referred to as just Neiman's, to the chagrin of the Marcus family no doubt, the first store was established in Texas in 1907 by three investors - Herbert Marcus, his sister Carrie, and her husband A.L. Neiman.

Legend has it they were invited to invest their money in a new company about to open up at that time called "Coca-Cola", but they were reluctant to do so. Instead they decided to open a high-end department store for all the new oil-rich Texas millionaires in their hometown of Dallas.

Although the store was an immediate success and has spread to major cities all across the United States, Stanley Marcus, CEO of the company fifty years later, once joked that "Neiman Marcus was founded upon bad business judgment!"

The best way to understand this store is to take a look at their website. Here's a link to the amazing world of Neiman Marcus.  But be prepared to spend a little time, and a good deal of money if you're so inclined.

The original spelling of the store was Neiman-Marcus, with a hyphen. And over the years the store has acquired the jestful nickname Needless-Markup, which I'm sure you've heard, of course. But if you peruse their web site for a few moments (especially 'The Christmas Book') you'll understand the intended humor of their nickname. Their prices are way out there!

At least we can dream, and do a little window shopping, right?
 
Thanks for dropping in,

Andrew

Ascot or Tie?

In the last essay about Black Tie versus White Tie  I received a comment from Angela that inquired: "My husband hates formal bow ties and wears an ascot or cravat instead. Is that ok? What are your thoughts?"

Bearing in mind that I'm not a fashion consultant Angela, and that GQ Magazine might take issue with me, I do have some observations from my long experience in dealing with the rich and famous.

Yes, ascots and cravats most certainly have their place and are acceptable in many situations, especially daytime affairs. But for formal evening events, it's risky. This kind of neck wear can appear stuffy if not arrogant - and it makes the statement "Look at me, I'm different."

Which is absolutely fine - if you are different and deserve to be looked at! Otherwise you might come across as pompous and pretentious, if not altogether ridiculous and absurd. 

Rule of thumb: if it's a large event with hundreds of guests, wear the ascot if you wish. But if it's an intimate black-tie dinner party with only a few guests, you'll stand out like a sore thumb. Be sure you deserve that attention and can handle the scrutiny. 

In this house I've seen distinguished authors, diplomats and European dignitaries wearing ascots to our black tie events. To their credit, they all carried it off rather well.

And I may get in trouble here, but we have a fun middle-aged divorcee who frequents this house with a different man each time she arrives. On one occasion she famously showed up with a young man not half her age wearing a tuxedo and a white silk ascot - but no shirt. You would think this would cause lifted eyebrows throughout the room, right? But in this older jaded crowd the repeated face lifts eliminate or minimize any reactions requiring the use of facial muscles!

Not to hurt any one's feelings - but in short you kinda have to be somebody to get away with wearing an ascot. Some accomplishment in life that makes you worthy of note - and I hope that makes sense. Here's a link to Goggle's image search for ascots. Just look at all the somebodies who can get away with wearing them.

If you think you're in this category in any way, then by all means guys, get out the ascot. This is America, right? Anything goes, and who am I to judge? But don't come crying to me if you're rebuffed, ignored or laughed at behind your back.

Thanks for dropping in,

Andrew

Black Tie versus White Tie!

I've received several inquiries about what's the difference between a black tie and white tie event. It's a fascinating topic and there's an interesting history involved if you have a couple of minutes this evening.

A while back Miss Helen sent an article from The Wall Street Journal entitled "Style and the Man" by Jamie Johnson in the Saturday/Sunday edition, April 30, 2011. Johnson was writing about the planned celebration of the disputed 125th anniversary of the modern dinner jacket first being introduced in 1886 at a posh resort on Lake Tuxedo in Orange County, New York.

But apparently the Prince of Wales, some twenty years earlier in 1865, had asked his tailor Henry Poole & Company in London to design a tail-less dinner jacket. And thus the dispute over dates began.

You see, in former decades (make that centuries) dinner jackets had tails both in front and back to guard against the cold. They were split in the middle on both sides to make it easier to walk. And this eventually evolved into the front tails being cut away to make it easier to ride a horse, leaving only the back tails - which survives to this day in certain circles.

But when a group of young friends (complaining that the long tails in back interfered with sitting, dining and dancing) showed up at the renowned Tuxedo Park Resort in 1886 with the back tails cut away, it created a shock and scandal not unlike Janet Jackson's famous wardrobe malfunction at the Super Bowl!

But the tail-less fashion took hold, both in America and in Europe. It still employed the white tie, cummerbund (original spelling) and silk or satin lapels - just no tails. But in time the white bow tie gave way to the black bow tie. And this is the currently recommended (not necessarily demanded) attire for a Black Tie event.

However, White Tie events are still very much alive. Often called 'Top Hat and Tails' it is the most formal dress code in Western fashion - and employs the original dinner jacket with back tails and a white bow tie. You'll see this mostly at state dinners and in diplomatic circles, both in America and in Europe. In a private home it can be considered extremely pretentious and is rarely seen - unless of course Regina herself and Prince Philip are stopping by for dinner.

By comparison, Black Tie events are almost informal nowadays. You'll see some gents in dinner jackets and black bow tie, and others in dark suits, even business suits.

The terms dinner jacket and tuxedo, by the way, are interchangeable these days. And there's barely a dispute that the name came from the Tuxedo Park Resort. In some uppity old-guard circles, however, the term tuxedo or tux is decidedly eschewed in favor of the original designation dinner jacket.

Of curious note, in America we have Tuxedo rental shops where you can rent a dinner jacket for just one evening. This would be for weddings and other reckless events, and it's a cultural phenomena for which I make no apologies. It's just how we are.

As always, thanks for dropping by,

Andrew

Bergdorf Goodman!

In my capacity here as butler and personal assistant, I just got off the phone making a luncheon reservation for the Missus and her girlfriend. They're off to Manhattan today to do a little shopping at Bergdorf's. So the first thing I did was notify her Personal Shopper there that the Missus is on the way.

Having been around in one form or another since 1901 Bergdorf Goodman is the epitome of a world-class, high fashion department store, for both women and men's apparel. In addition to clothing, there's gifts, jewelry, perfumes, china, crystal, silver, stationery, linens, a shoe salon, bridal salon, and a stunning collection of furs. On the penthouse floor (where the owners once lived) you can enjoy a full-service makeover at the celebrated John Barrett Beauty Salon.

Sitting at the very crossroads of the fashion world, Bergdorf Goodman is located at 58th Street and Fifth Avenue - right across from the world-famous Plaza Hotel. And by the way, the store occupies the very spot where one of the Vanderbilt Mansions once stood.

Plus Tiffany's, Harry Winston and Cartier's all share this not-so-shabby neighborhood.

The lunch reservation I made today is for the BG Restaurant on Bergdorf's seventh floor. Although not a large space, this lunch and tea room is the height of elegance and sophistication. You can have a salad, sandwich and a nice glass of wine for $75 or less. Here's a fun link to their current menu.

Frequented mostly by ladies who lunch (more likely than not dressed in conservative Chanel suits) you'll also find any number of tourists who've come to enjoy the spectacular views of  Central Park and the dazzling buildings on upper Fifth Avenue.

If you're planning a trip to New York anytime soon, it's definitely worth your while to browse through this temple of grace and elegance and have a little nosh at BG's. But you can catch that view of Central Park on the north side of any upper floor - not just the restaurant.

Thanks for stopping by this evening,

Andrew

Do Charm Schools Still Exist?

Yes they do! While they may have evolved with the times, Charm Schools are still around and serve an important purpose within certain circles. Primarily they teach social etiquette in such areas as:

- How to greet someone (especially dignitaries and royalty).
- How to shake hands and/or bow.
- Proper topics for social conversation.
- Letter writing, invitations, regrets, and thank you notes.
- How to set a formal dining table.
- And physical comportment - such as posture, how to walk with style, how to sit, even how to eat.

Also called Finishing Schools, they flourished in earlier times when professional careers were not open to women. They were designed primarily to prepare young women for marriage - hopefully into high society. But many of these schools closed when women began entering college and going out into the marketplace, seeking careers of their own.

Even so, social skills are still quiet important, and many prominent schools have survived. It's well known that even Diana, Princess of Wales briefly attended the Institut Alpin Videmanette - a famous finishing school in Switzerland.

In modern times these schools have evolved and are experiencing a resurgence, especially as the rich grow in numbers. And major corporations are jumping in and sending their prized employees to what they call Protocol or Etiquette schools, especially when dealing with foreign corporations. But long gone are the days when every city and small town in America had a "Miss Lovely's Finishing School for Girls". 

For more information on the best schools still in existence in America, England, or Switzerland, just Google the words Finishing Schools.

I hope this has been helpful, and as always, thanks for stopping by,

Andrew

Addendum to "What Do Rich People Talk About?"

In our last conversation entitled What Do Rich People Talk About? I was telling you how the rich (at least at parties) dodge any talk about money, business, health and politics. But to add to that, I'd just like to say I always find it amusing the way they sling around numbers in their conversations!

For example: If  I said to you I bought a decent table wine for "nine fifty" at the local supermarket, you'd immediately understand I mean nine-dollars-and-fifty-cents, right? ($9.50)

But if you heard "nine fifty" from the lips of the rich, you can be sure that would mean they paid nine-hundred-and-fifty dollars for that bottle of wine! ($950.00)

Likewise, if you hear a number like "seventy-five" tossed around, depending entirely upon the context of the conversation, that could mean anything from:

- A decent cigar for $75.
- An inexpensive off-the-rack cocktail dress from Neiman Marcus for seven thousand-five-hundred dollars ($7,500).
- A haute couture cocktail dress for seventy-five-thousand dollars! ($75,000).
- Or a prime piece of real-estate, suitable for building an office tower, for seventy-five-million. ($75,000,000)

So if you're in the business of eavesdropping, it's absolutely essential you pay attention to the context of the conversation. I mean, to my knowledge there's no such thing as a seventy-five-million-dollar cocktail dress, right? You've gotta know what you're listening to in order to interpret it correctly.

I hope that shed more light, and thanks as always for stopping by.

Andrew

Private Railway Cars for the Rich!

Recently my employers purchased tickets for a journey on the world-famous "Orient Express" from Paris to Istanbul - and we're all thrilled of course to get rid of them for awhile. But did you know that some rich people have their own private railway cars?

If you have around a million dollars to spare you can purchase a private railway coach (also called a Private Varnish) that includes a sitting parlor, a full kitchen, a dining room, bedrooms (called Staterooms on a train or ship), an observation platform on the back of the train, and even bunk-beds for servants - someone like me.

The luxury of a Private Varnish is limited only by the imagination. You want a baby-grand piano in the sitting parlor? Tiffany stemware in the bar? Fine Italian Pratesi sheets in the staterooms? Whatever you wish.

In addition to the interior design and the purchase price of the car itself, it'll cost you another $15,000 - $20,000 a year for storage, insurance, and maintaining the car to Amtrak standards. And then, it costs anywhere from $500 to $1,500 to have it pulled from storage and added to the make-up of a scheduled train or locomotive.

As of this writing (2011) Amtrak charges about $2.10 per mile to pull a private coach. That would be roughly $6,000 just for mileage from New York to Los Angeles. But double that amount if you want to get back home, right? Then, there are other charges such as over-night parking on Amtrak property, septic services, coach washing and cleaning, crew charges, and so on.

While having your own private varnish is a huge status symbol of course, you don't actually have to own one to enjoy the luxury and leisure of  private-car travel. There are companies out there that will rent private cars for family reunions, business meetings, and for eager politicians going on the stump, trying to recreate Lincoln's and FDR's famous cross country "whistle stops", giving speeches from the observation platform at the back of the train. These rentals can cost you an easy ten-thousand a day, and up.

Having said all that about owning a private coach and attaching it to a scheduled train - there's always one step above in the world of the rich. Get this: there are some rich people in this world (a few at best) who own not only a private car but also their own Locomotive. Which just blows me away.

Mercifully, my employers do not have their own private coach, and thank God! I would HATE being trapped with them for days on end in such close quarters. I'm sure you understand.

Thanks for dropping by this evening,
Andrew

Expensive Clothes Hangers for the Rich!

I feel rather sure none of us have ever recovered from actress Joan Crawford's emotional meltdown in the film Mommie Dearest when she screams at her terrified daughter No Wire Hangers! That disturbing memory has carried over into my job as the butler in a billionaire's home, and I've made sure there are no wire hangers to be found anywhere on this property.

In this house all garments are now hung on matching wooden hangers, all carefully turned in the same direction and evenly spaced in between. But what kind of hangers do rich people use and where do we get them?

Remember in nice department stores where everything is hung on wooden hangers with the store's name or emblem printed in gold or silver lettering on each hanger? Well, there are companies in this world that design exclusive custom-made hangers not only for department stores but also for famous clothes designers, fine hotels, and even for private homes.

These companies will imprint your initials, your family crest, your corporate emblem, whatever you wish onto high-quality polished wooden hangers - and it's going to cost you a small fortune. Just take a look at this link The Most Expensive Journal describing a hanger - one hanger that costs $460!

More down to earth, take a look at Henry Hanger Company of America, one of the oldest and most respected hanger companies in America, serving both commercial and private clientele. This is where we get our stuff. They do a great job with custom logos and our closets look spectacular. 

I know how extravagant this all must sound, but if your wardrobe is full of designer gowns. furs, and $20,000 haute couture cocktail dressers, thin wire hangers just won't do. You'll want the very best garment-specific hangers available to help keep their shape and to display them properly.

Thanks for dropping in this evening,
Andrew

Stationery for the Rich!

We've talked about RSVP to Invitations and Regrets, and just a few days ago I mentioned Thank You notes. But what kind of paper is needed for all this correspondence? There are some definite stationery requirements in this world of the rich, but first I want to get the correct spelling underway:

Stationery (with 'ery') is paper you write on. Stationary (with 'ary') means sitting on the sofa all afternoon, watching a football game. You'd be surprised how many people get this wrong, even by stationery sellers themselves. With that out of the way, now to the subject of what kind of stationery rich people buy and where it can be found. Here's some things you'll want to consider first:

- Paper Content:   Pulp, rag stock, 100% cotton, or blends.

- Paper Weight:    Heavier is generally considered of greater value.

- Paper Color:        White, colored or Ecru.  We choose ecru.

- Watermarks:       This translucent mark will identify a quality manufacturer.

- Printing Style:      Lithography, Thermography, Letterpress or Engraving.

This can become an intensely interesting topic, going all the way back to papyrus in ancient Egypt. And for those who want more in-depth information about paper quality and where to find it locally, I’m going to refer you to the Stationers Guild. Their motto is: “To help discerning buyers locate highly experienced stationers in their neighborhood, and assist them in crafting their personalized stationery.” Here’s the Stationers Guild link.

Now the truth is, as the Guild says, buying stationery is a very personal and tactile experience. You'll want to see, touch and feel the paper, and how it bends and folds. And you can’t do that online, can you? Which is why I’m recommending you start with the Stationers Guild first, to find local outlets. Once you decide upon what you like, then the online descriptions will be understandable and you can order from anywhere, even old-world stationers in Europe.   

But where do I buy stationery for my rich employers, you might ask? Because I already know the touch, feel and texture of what my employers want, I always go online to the renowned Crane & Company, an American paper manufacturer dating to the Revolutionary War.

This company has a world class reputation for fine stationery and engraving, and does in fact manufacturer the paper that is used for US currency. (The fact that the American dollar is so devalued these days should have no reflection upon Crane.)

In this house we always choose (a) 100% cotton, (b) ecru in color, (c) weights ranging from 32 pounds for stationery to 92 pounds for fold-over notes, and (d) as for printing choice, it's always engraved. 

Each one of the above choices means the cost goes up and up and up. Here’s a link to something similar we get from Crane and Company. You'll have to type a number in the "Quantity" box to get an idea of price. The more you order, the lower the cost. But just start with 100. As you can see, it's not difficult to pay around $4.50 per letter or note card, or $450 for a box of one hundred.

So we’re looking at slightly over five dollars here (including stamp) to write one letter to one person by mail. Formal Invitations, of course, cost considerably more. So if you’re sending out a thousand invitations for a Christmas party, this can run into real money.

Thanks for stopping by tonight.

Andrew